First, I want to say thanks to each of you that replied to my last blog post titled, “If only I would’ve.” One particular response stood out because it was about making decisions. I’d like to share it with you because it hit home with me, and I thought it may do the same for you. The question was, “Is thinking about waiting . . . not the best idea?”

I know when I was struggling with infertility, decisions were difficult for me. At the time, the stakes were high and I was constantly wavering between a barrage of options, trying to decide “what to do next?”

With the internet, we have so much information at our fingertips. For example, when I would search “how to get pregnant” on google, I got over 20 million results in less than one second! Then, add to that all the advice I received from everyone around me that knew I was “trying.” I was overwhelmed, to put it mildly.

In the beginning, my decision-making skills started off strong, but as the days, months and years passed by without any success, this changed. I started to doubt myself and the decisions I made. My mind would go into the what if, should’ve, could’ve dance, which we know gets us nowhere.

Do you find it difficult to make decisions?

I’ve come a long way and I still feel that I am working on my decision-making skills; however, I’ve found ways to help me get unstuck from the grip of indecision. As such, I’d like to share one of my favorite practices with you today.

Drumroll, please . . . It’s mediation! I know it sounds simplistic, but hear me out. Part of the reason I got stuck in indecision was that I was not tuning in, listening and trusting myself. I was getting stuck in my head, my thoughts and my fears. I’ve discovered that when I can stop, slow down, tune in and listen to myself, the answers I am looking for come to me.

It’s a process and it’s not for everyone, but if it is, it can help bring clarity into your life.

Here’s a short meditation you can try the next time you find yourself stuck in indecision.

  • First, find some time to sit or lie comfortably in a quiet space.
  • Keep a journal, notebook or piece of paper and pen nearby (optional).
  • Start by observing your breath, in and out.
  • Now close your eyes or gently focus on something nearby.
  • Keep your focus on your breath and simply breathe, in and out.
  • Tune into how your body feels, simply observe and breathe into any areas that may need attention.
  • Be gentle with yourself and keep focusing on the rhythm of your breath, in and out.
  • If your mind starts to wander, simply bring your focus back to your breath.
  • When you feel calm and relaxed, simply ask yourself a question you have been pondering.
  • Continue breathing in and out.
  • If nothing comes to you immediately, that is okay, just keep breathing and when you feel ready gently open your eyes and return to your surroundings.
  • Now write down any thoughts that come up, don’t analyze them or question them, just write them down.
  • Whatever you experienced or did not experience is okay.
  • I would encourage you to start off slow with only a couple minutes and work your way up.

For those of you that feel you cannot turn off your thoughts or feel too restless to meditate, you can take a walk and clear your mind by focusing on your surroundings, or you can move right into the part of writing down your thoughts that come up.

What about you? Do you have any practices, tips, suggestions that work for you when you having a difficult time making a decision?