Have you ever typed out your answer to the question, “What does your spiritual life mean to you?” Recently someone asked me to do this. I thought it was a great exercise and wanted to share my answer with you. If you have not thought about this recently, I encourage you to type out your answer. It makes you think a bit deeper about your response.
My spiritual life is my connection to God, to Spirit, to something bigger than me. It is my pathway to peace. It is what helps ground and centers me. For a long time, I was waiting for it all to make perfect sense to me. I wanted hard, concrete answers to allow myself to feel truly connected.
I was raised Catholic. As I became an adult, I did not feel the pull to continue attending Sunday mass, so I stopped. I tried to reconnect multiple times because I wanted to feel that spiritual connection, but just couldn’t. I can recall having conversations with friends that were connected to their church, to their faith in religion. I wanted that, but there was a disconnect, something in me that knew it was not my spiritual path. I felt like there were too many unanswered questions and too many conflicting messages which caused me to lack faith in the church.
Was it faith that I was missing? Faith in something bigger than me? Faith that everything will, can work out? Faith that there is a reason for why things happen or don’t happen? Faith that there is a predetermined path in life for me?
It wasn’t until I was broken, stuck, and lost that I finally discovered what my spiritual life meant to me. After experiencing over 6 years of trauma and heartbreak over not being able to conceive a child to full term, I needed help. I needed faith. I needed to believe that I was going to be okay.
It was energy healing that opened me up. It was amazing. I couldn’t fully describe how it was happening or what was happening. All I knew was that I felt lighter, freer, and a bit more hopeful each time I experienced a session.
I had also tried multiple types of traditional talk therapy, but they didn’t help me at the time. Was it because I did not find the “right” therapist for me? I don’t know. Although what I did know was that my energy healing sessions were allowing my body, mind, and my soul to release the hurt, pain, disappointment, shame, guilt, sadness, grief, anger, etc., etc., that I had been holding on to for all of those years.
Wait, is this what it feels like to have faith? Faith that I will be okay? Faith that there is something bigger than me, guiding me, supporting me? Faith that everything can and will work out? It felt good. It felt like I could stop holding my breath and finally exhale.
I believe that my spiritual life is always evolving, changing, and shifting as I do. I am okay with that. I love learning and digging into personal growth and development. Although at the core it is all about returning to love. Love for myself, love for my life, love for everything, and everyone. I have let go of the idea that it needs to make perfect sense. I also no longer need hard, concrete answers to feel connected (that doesn’t mean that sometimes I would still like them).
I am on MY spiritual path. To me this means:
- I am connected to something bigger than me – God, Spirit.
- I have faith.
- I am being supported, guided.
- I have a path in life and I embrace it.
- I am safe.
- Everything will work out for the best.
- I trust myself, my intuition, my inner knowing.
And so much more. . .
I consider my spiritual life a practice, not a destination. It doesn’t mean that I no longer struggle, get upset, or have difficult times. It means I connect with God (Spirit, Angels, the Divine, Source) to help lead the way – to guide me. It means I am continuously surrendering, letting go of the past, outcomes, comparisons, expectations, perfectionism. It means I am aware of my connection. I embrace it. I listen and learn from it. It means that I will remember to return to love.
“Faith, it does not make things easy, it makes them possible.” Luke 1:37